Here comes the sun.. and other calamaties..

When you think of Islands, you might be thinking: Palm or coconut trees; blue clear sea; sands; lobsters, high reasonable tempratures, etc. So, when you think of the UK, all that preconcieved notion of what you thought about Islands should just about die right now. I'm saying kill those thoughts right now. I'm telling you, had the politicians of the time knew how things would have turned out weather wise when they sent out prisoners, colonists and others out to Australia, maybe the UK wouldn't be as we know it. Some of you might be reading this and thinking, "Well, if you don't like this country, why don't you go back to where ever it is you came from?" I pay tax. Nuff said.

But I'm not here to discuss the merits of what's good and bad about this country. I'm sounding off about what the sun brings out in this country. First off: Hayfever. Now, there is Malaria, Yellow Fever, Scarlet fever, and all kinds of other fevers. Hayfever, on the other hand, is a summer nasty that rears itself in the form of sneezes, stuffy and sniffling noses, and all because of the high pollen count. Ah-ah!! I've been to countries where you'd expect there to be a high pollen. Nope. Only in the UK.

Speaking of noses, you might just be one of the selected few to develop superhuman powers of sniffing that almighty funk of people not having baths during the summer. Good luck to you if you have to use the underground or find yourself in a packed bus. And if you're a regular to nightclubs, what with the sweat, grime and so forth, well, you only have yourself to blame for being a glutton for punishment.

Another calamity that comes with the sun coming out in the UK is that everybody wants a tan. Thus, that brings about anatomical sights that should not be shared with other people in the world. Now, there is flaunting it, and there is "Oh, dear God ! No!!"What's worse is that even if the temprature is really low (15-18c is low for me), I have fair skinned people shedding their coats and jumpers, just to have any ray of sun on them. And for those who have a tan already, and have a toned body to go with it, then it's a question of going all Adonis and Aphrodite to the opposite sex, only for a Pandora's box to open up. (It's all Greek to me!)

Another product that comes with the sun brings out 'Alpha male' (yeah, right!) neantherthals driving roof down sports cars with music blasting out for the whole world to hear (the music sucks most of the time, anyway) reminiscent to that that scene from "Apocalypse Now".


I could go on, but nah.. it's time for the antihistamines.